This side of sanity...
Well so I am back on the right side of sanity. I spent the week putting back together what the meeting had torn apart.With hindsight, I can see now that, no matter what I would have said, it would have been wrong. He was determined to pull me down a peg or two. Never mind though, because since then, I had a lot of time to think and pray. I just spent two days at a friend's flat, who has gone away for the weekend, really seeking God in all this. During the course of the weekend, I picked up a book that was lying around the flat "Twentysomething" by Margaret Feinberg. Here is what I found:
“Life isn’t about the big break. It is about a series of little breaks, or opportunities, that God entrusts to us. They come at odd times, usually unexpected, and rarely without increased responsibilities. You have to pay your dues. You have to pay a lot of them. And in the end, the difference between those who make it and those who don’t, is simple: You have to decide to never give up.”
Well that one shouted to me loud and clear.
The other thing I found is the following, from the same book:
“I can do things on my own. I can defend myself, I can accomplish things. Or I can choose to place myself before God in humble dependence, knowing that I need him. I am learning to lean against his breast as the disciple did at the last supper"
Now this one isn't as straightforward as the last, but it was speaking to me about the need to not defend myself. To let the Lord defend me because that's his job. My job is to stay faithful and pursue the calling he put on my life. His job is to make the road straight and to defend me when others accuse me.
So all in all I feel a lot more together than I did on Monday - sorry about some of the words in Monday's post. I thought about changing them/cutting them, but then I thought no, this is meant to be a "true" record of my journey into the CofE. So true you'll get - with all the ugly bits thrown in too.
posted by Kat @ 1:55 pm
6 Comments:
Lil' Sis,
You sound like you are feeling much better about the whole thing and I am so very glad for you. Just chalk it up to one more learning experience on how to deal with difficult people. You know dearie.... it's not going to matter one whit what this guy thinks does or says because if GOD wants you to be ordained in the CofE then you will be.Plain and simple.
This guy is just a stepping stone in your path to victory. If he becomes a boulder then I'm sure God will give you the rock climbing gear to get over him.
I loved the quotes you mentioned too. They do hit home!
Keep that candle burning!
Cat,
It is good to see your heart lifted in this.
No special scriptures are anything except that: God's promises made to the Isrealites in Babylon where big promises. Many years passed before the fulfillment & utter faithfulness of God in them.
Consider Abraham(Abram) and the promises made to him.
Many years (and one or two mistakes by Abraham too) passed between the promise and the reality ... but Hebrews 11, he is the first in a much hallowed list of God-lovers-living-by-faith ...
God's glory has burned through the ages, and we will be a part (by His Grace!) of how it burns out into the future ... like a signal fire strong vibrant and clear against all things.
Keep that candle burning!
GB ...
Cat (and other readers!),
Sorry for the multiplicity of comments! I got sucker-punched by a few DNS failures (and *had* thought that the publish had failed!) ...
Big apologies!
TF
Hi Kat,
Just want to say I'm proud of you and the way you have come to terms with this knockback.
Stick with Daddy and don't ever give up, trust Him, He always carries us through the rocky places. He is our shield and our defender.
Keep da Faith!
P
TF
I deleted your multiple comments. Thanks for the encouragement (same goes to Lisa and Paul)
Hi Kat!
Praise God. I admire your obedience to just take it up to the Lord and be still. If it's truly God's will for you then he will surely make a path for you, as difficult it would seem to be. Will keep praying for you!
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